So my last
blog was all about using the “Let It Bee” approach to cope with situations that
are out with our control. I showed how it is possible to let these situations
evolve from something that we try to resist and causes negativity in our lives,
into a positive experience, so that we can enable ourselves to soar above our
challenging circumstances. The three techniques I shared that you can utilise
at these times were; 1) Taking a step back and asking yourself what you could
gain from the situation 2) Sharing your vulnerability with others and 3)
Acceptance. I hope you found these tips helpful and found you were able to “Let
It Bee”, in challenging circumstances …I would be interested to know of any
successes…
The next
topic that I am going to share with you all is: “Confidence Buzz!” This is a
way to induce and cultivate more self-confidence and I am going to share with
you, 3 ways to help you to do this…I believe that confidence is the intrinsic quality
of people who lead happy, successful and fulfilled lives.
It helps us
to:
- communicate our wants and our
needs to others
- set and achieve goals
- experience success at work
- plan and deliver presentations
- connect with new people and
cultivate new relationships (personally and professionally)
- begin a new interest
- cope effectively with life’s
challenges
- broaden your life experiences
Being able to
induce a “Confidence Buzz” can help us through most circumstances, before,
during and after they arise. To me confidence is like a flower…It begins as a
seed which is planted in the soil (or within us), it needs nourishment, care
and attention, to grow and evolve, until it finally blossoms, into something
that is beautiful and an intrinsic part of who and what we are…
If you think
of the most confident person you know, think of their qualities…For me, in my
minds eye, posture stands out, the way they hold their body commands attention
and oozes self-belief. When a confident person walks into a room, others take
notice and recognise their confidence. Having strong posture is known to make a
person more believable than those who slouch or fold their arms when they are
talking.
1) Power pose – a power pose is when we
stand with our hands on our hips legs hip width apart, shoulders aligned and
backward and head up looking forward.
This stance
when done for just 2 minutes has been found by Amy Cuddy, Social Psychologist
of Harvard Business School to increase our testosterone hormone in our bodies.
This hormone is associated with males but females possess it too. It boosts
self-confidence and helps to make us more believable, especially in times of
stress. As well as increasing testosterone levels, the Power Pose has been
found to reduce Cortisol levels in the blood stream. This is our stress
hormone, so my Power Posing we reduce the levels of stress that we feel. I find
that fascinating. I learnt this pose at a 5 day Integrating Sciences course
with Dr David Hamilton, author and speaker with Hay House. I now use a 2 minute
power pose prior to going into stressful situations, such as presenting
information to work colleagues, taking part in meetings and have used it in
interview settings also. So I hope it helps you as well.
2) Fake it until you make it – this is
when we act out the way we want to come across prior to the event that is
causing us to feel nervous.
Using the
dress rehearsal to help us during an event that we know is likely to cause
nervousness gives us more power than if we just go in cold. This way you are
able to draw from your experience during the dress rehearsal and the more your
practice something the better you become at it. This might seem a bit false but
the most successful people in life have used the “fake it until you make it”
technique. You may even want to write a script, look on the mirror, alter what
you say until it becomes 2nd nature and you feel your slick enough
to make it during the real deal.
3) 3C vision/peripheral vision – this is
when we use our vision to cultivate the feeling of relaxation when we are in
the stressful situation. This can be done by looking at a point on a wall above
eye level, focus on that point and then notice what you can see around that
point to 360 degrees. Notice the colours, shadows and objects that you can see
at the furthest possible point in all directions, from where you are focussing
on.
It is
absolutely impossible to feel anything other than relaxed when you are in the
peripheral part of your vision. This is because we are designed to go into
tunnel vision when in fight/flight mode…i.e. when we are stressed. If we bypass
this by altering our vision into the periphery, we intercept the stress
response and become instantly more relaxed, thus cultivating a “confidence
buzz”.
You can use
these 3 tips to induce A “confidence buzz” in any situation that you know will
cause you stress or to feel nervous. It’s amazing the effects of confidence on
your life circumstances. Once you have confidence in your own ability and can
convince others of these abilities, you will be amazed at how your life can
change. If you feel yourself becoming stressed or nervous in a situation, use
the 3C Vision to bring you back to your confident and relaxed state.
I believe our
natural state is one of confidence. I also believe that our busy and modern way
of life can challenge our natural way of being. Modern life almost conditions
us to compare ourselves to others. So confidence is “natural” and comparing is
“normal”.
Why not BEE
the star of your own show and astonish yourself….Good luck.
